Cap't Bovine's Harp Bazaar: The Bard Store WEEK 1

Illustration for article titled Capt Bovines Harp Bazaar: The Bard Store WEEK 1

Moo. First just let me say that bards are the best. That’s right. Bards are the only class worth playing. SO WHAT if we can’t attack. WE CAN SING!

  • 1 Song per week
  • Songs begin the first time you log points for a week and end the first day thereafter that you do not. Ex. If you run Monday, the song starts. If you log points Tuesday the song continues. If you do NOT log points on Tuesday the song stops. You cannot restart a song.
  • 2 skills per week unless otherwise noted.
  • War Anthem is a skill
  • You can purchase only 1 song and 1 skill per week unless otherwise noted
  • Skills can only be used if you have added points that day


  • Hymn of the Cheater (50 gold) If Hymn of Plenty is sung four days at least, your team gains 20% extra gold. This gold is applied to the base amount of gold won. Who needs the glory when you’ve got the gold?
  • Chrome Chorus (50 gold) If a character dies while Chrome Chorus is active, all players get 10 health and the dead character is brought back to life with half health. I live, I die, I live again! Witness!
  • Stacatto Stickers (55 gold) All heroes have a 50% chance to gain +1 to their logged points. This is a one time roll, yes/no for the entire team for each day. Killing two birds with one stone isn’t nearly as fun as killing two Furbies with a dull axe.


  • Immovable Object 3 points (25 Gold) Grants one hero Physical Resistance for one dayIt’s not a tumor!
  • Unstoppable Force 5 points (25 gold) Grants one hero Spell Damage for one day. If used on a mage, this ignores Magic Missile (the full damage for the day goes through as spell damage). Don’t you know who I am? I’m the juggernaut!
  • Ginsu Knife 3 points (25 gold) Gives 1 character a 50% chance to land a critical strike. Critical strikes do 1.5x damage. (ex. 10 damage becomes 15) It slices, it dices, it makes julienne fries! Will not break! It broke...
  • The ol’ Razzle Dazzle! 5 points (35 gold) - Pull out the the stops, and dazzle the creature with your magic tricks; Creature has a 50% chance to not attack that dayIs this your... CARD?! *Thanks to Kluge for this one*
  • Presto Chango 5 Points (45 gold) - Take one attack from either the Warrior or the mage and move it to a different day of your choice. This cannot be used to kill a monster a day earlier - ex. if you move a killing blow from Wednesday to Tuesday, the monster is still counted as having been killed on Wednesday. You should worry more about what I have behind my back than what I have in my hat.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter